December 5th, 1957
Gellert,
盖勒特,
You've hit more than one nail on the head, I'm afraid. Hammered them in, even. There is so much that I fear, in the end. And--and I do not know what. The more I think on it all, on our history—decades of it by now, startlingly enough—the more I cannot untangle myself.
我恐怕这远远超过一针见血的范畴了,你这简直是在把血淋淋的现实剖开给我看。说到底,令我害怕的东西太多了。而且——我弄不清这到底是为什么。这些关于我们的过去,这似乎遥不可及的几十年。似乎只要我越去思考,便会愈发地难以解脱。
I first made my Pensieve, you realize, to sort through every memory I had of our time together. To look, with an objective eye, as best as I could, at who you were, what you were doing, how you were acting. To see if I should have been able to predict your actions, if I was as short-sighted and blinded to your darkness as everybody around me thought I was. So, yes, what you seek is there, well-preserved. "Yes," I said, "she might drop dead at the sight. Though of us or the blood magic, I'm not sure." I then went on with that ultimately doomed theory of mine about Transfiguration-based amplification of the latter.
如你所知,我第一次制作冥想盆,是想要去整理那些有关于我们的回忆。是为了尽可能客观地看待,你是怎样的人,又是怎样做了这些事。是为了弄清我是否预料到过你之后的所作所为,为了弄清我是否沦为了别人口中目光短浅,又对你的暗面视若无睹的人。所以,是的,你要找的那行诗就在这里,它被完好的保存着——“我同意,”那时我说,“她看到这一切一定会被吓个半死,但我不确定那是因为我们还是血咒。”然后,我便研究起了我那注定要失败的,基于变形术来改进血咒的理论。
I am sorry for the delay. It was a little thing, and fair to ask. But—no, I am still inexcusably tangled.
很抱歉回信得有些晚了。我有些小事需要处理,但你可以过问,就当是扯平了。只不过——我还是那样不可救药地乱成一团。
I must go, I am afraid.
恐怕我得即刻动身了。
我现在真是汉尼拔看多了,感觉每次读信的时候是邓教就喜欢在脑子里模拟裘德洛的声音,是格皇就喜欢模拟麦子的声线,我自己念英语的腔调也变得有点像贝姐……(扶额
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第19章 第十八只猫头鹰